A Day of Relief!!!

A huge sigh of relief came out of me when the Genetisis told us that the ultrasound looks normal.  The list of things they look at, and how in depth they go, everything is perfectly normal!!  Thank you!!!

I had blood test done at 16 weeks to check for down syndrome, spinal bifida, and a couple other things they look for.  This is done for women 35 and over.  I had this done with the first pregnancy too.  Well, the blood test came back in the red zone for Spinal Bifida.  My numbers this time were worse then the first pregnancy.  3.2 (which is 1in 124).  First pregnancy was 2.4 (which is 1 in 362).  How is it that AGAIN, my levels for spinal bifida are red zoned??  Even the ultrasound doc asked me "makes no sense how you had this situation in the first pregnancy and everything normal and again this time and everything normal).  So the ultrasound doc even told me right there that everything was normal, which was a fast relief instead of waiting and waiting for an answer.    Now this makes me wonder and I HAVE to find out.....why are my blood test coming back red zone?!!!  And I WILL find out....the research has already begun and I've already made phone calls to head departments.  lol..  I ALWAYS need answers.

But at least things are perfect and all is ok!  PHEW!!! 

We wanted to find out the sex of the baby today, but the other ultrasound lady who did a bit of the ultrasound was a student still.  So she wasnt 100% certain.  Plus baby was moving too much.  She thought she could kinda see but told us to confirm in 2 weeks at our 20 week ultrasound.  Then things start going through my head and I'm having feelings.....I would LOVE another girl!!  BUT is it  cause I want another Aspen??  Yes!!  I do!  But I have to realize I wont have another "Aspen".  And if I have a boy, will I be upset because its not another girl?  Maybe??  But then I thought to myself that no I wont be upset because I will never have another Aspen.  Aspen is Aspen.  There will only be one.  Each child we have will have their own personalities and character.  Aspen was SUCH a good baby, no problems, and her character now is incredible!!  But each child will have their own unique character that I will LOVE!  But I must say there was a moment that I felt sad.  Sad that I couldnt have another Aspen. 

Have any moms out there felt this way?  How did you feel when you wanted all boys or all girls or maybe one of each, and you didnt get that?  Were you sad?  How long did it take to get over it? 

People should warn you ahead of time of what feeling you might feel.  I had a client that said she wished they warned her or prepared her of how she was going to feel when she was pregnant with her second child....she felt guilty!!!  Everyone will have different feelings over different things.  I didnt feel guilty at all....I jsut wanted another Aspen.  But quickly realized that I can't. 

Wow the feelings you can feel as a mother!!

But all in all ...... as long as baby is healthy!

Nina xo